Speaking of Social Ineptitude...

I've decided it's Shame Week here at The Heidi Diaries. Sharing those stories from my walks, made me think of another time and place when I was basically... a big nerd. And it had nothing to do with dogs.

To preface my story...you remember the movie Dirty Dancing? (Durr, who doesn't?) Remember the scene where Baby gets into the clubhouse where all the dancers go to hang out and "unwind" every night? Well Johnny asks his cousin what Baby is doing there and she says, "I carried a watermelon" and after Johnny walks away she realizes how stupid that sounded and says, "I carried a watermelon?!?" Just in case you don't know what I'm talking about, check out the scene on youtube here (by the way, the scene is a little long, but feel free to enjoy the whole thing).

Anyway, back to my story. Once upon a time, in college, I had a crush on a boy. But not just any boy, a super-cute hockey player boy. We shall call him Lenny. I loved all things hockey and was a die-hard fan, so imagine my excitement to learn that a super-cute hockey player was in a class with me! And sat right by me! And could actually hold some intelligent conversation from time to time. He seemed more shy than you'd think...he WAS a hockey star after all...but we would often chat before class started. Now, Lenny knew I was a smartie and occasionally asked to borrow my notes when he had to miss a class or two. I think I even borrowed his notes once and they weren't bad. All semester I secretly pined for Lenny, but figured it was never gonna happen.

But then, an opportunity presented itself (gasp). Lenny was going to miss one of our last classes before the final. Being a nice person, and secretly pining for Lenny, I took a risk and sent an email offering to study with Lenny for the final. Don't get me wrong, I was actually concerned about the final too and really thought having a partner to study with would be great. Mostly, though, I just hoped it was my big chance.

I lived with 3 friends (and 1 odd roommate) in an apartment that year. The 3 of us were pretty close and had planned to make Christmas cookies together as a way to unwind during finals week and to spend some quality time with one of our roomies, who would be studying abroad the next semester. One night, while we were all hanging out at home, the phone rang. It was for me. I can't remember who answered it, but I think she asked the caller if she could tell me who was calling.

It was Lenny.

(Gosh, I'm getting all anxious just writing and reliving this moment!)

My roomies knew of my crush, so there was squealing and giggling, maybe even some high-fives, I don't know. I was terrified, but answered the phone as calmly as I could.

(I apologize that my memory of this initial part is sketchy. My memory was clearly affected by my terror.) We did our normal thing- I think he usually greeted people with "What's going on" or something super-original like that- and I always had an equally creative and original response, probably, "Not much." I'm pretty sure he brought up my email and our upcoming final. And then Lenny said:

"So what are you doing tomorrow night?"

To which I cheerfully responded, "I'm making cookies with my roommates!"

Lenny paused for a moment before replying, "Making cookies with your roommates?"

Me, "Yeah, you know, Christmas cookies." I think I babbled here for a second. At this point, I'm pretty sure my roommates were frantically waving at me and trying to signal that it was no big deal to miss part of our cookie-baking extravaganza. Such good friends. Wanting me to get my big chance with Lenny.

Lenny, "Oh, well I was going to see if you wanted to meet at the library to study together for our final. But if you're too busy..."

Now quickly trying to make like it's no big thang and of course I'd LOVE to study, after all our final is coming up soon... Plans were made, the conversation ended.

I looked at my roommate and said, "I'm making cookies with my roommates?!? I'm making cookies with my roommates?!"

I was horrified. Embarrassed. Ashamed. I felt like Baby from Dirty Dancing. My roommates didn't even really understand why I decided to share that bit of info with Lenny. All I could say was, "Well, it's what we had planned. He asked what I was doing, and that's what I'm supposed to be doing." Oy.

In the end, the cookies got made, I passed the final, but I never did show Lenny my face again.

OK, not that last part. I showed up the next night to study. Lenny brought his cute hockey player roommate along, probably to act as a buffer and witness in case I tried to kidnap him or something. Awesome. He also asked me about the cookies. I hid my mortification and muttered something dumb. And then we studied. I think he also passed the final.

The end.